New Blog

So, I don't know if you've noticed, but I'm pretty self-conscious about this blog. I didn't have a good handle on what to do with it after I didn't need to update it for my internship. So, I started a new blog where I can just put the creative writing samples I want to display. I'll use this blog now for other things that I feel like writing about, and I think that's the best solution for my issues with this blog. None of the stuff on the new blog is "new" but I have updated some of the writing you've seen here. The new blog, if you're interested, is Writing Patches. http://writingpatches.blogspot.com/ Thank you for putting up with this.

Too Sad to Actually Be Fiction...

You shouldn't live your life in anger and, the younger you are (at least in my case), the easier it is to stand by that sentiment. But sometimes things happen. Sometimes, you develop grudges you never thought you were capable of holding. One day, you can't stay angry at somebody for more than four hours, and the next day you've had a grudge for over a year...things change--people wear on you.

Let's take what I just said, and apply it to an entire group of people. Let's call these people "The English Department". So, imagine The English Department holds no grudges. They are an easy-going, loving and accepting group of people. Maybe a few people get on their nerves, and maybe they have fights every once in a while, but none of that anger sticks. Then, let's say, one day, somebody comes along and burns down The English Department's home. This doesn't sit well with these loving people and they make some noise about it. They are ignored by the offender. So they make more noise. The dispute gets to the point where the offender has his pride hurt by The English Department and The English Department is officially holding a grudge. Now, what we have to imagine is the offender has a great deal of power over The English Department. The world is set.

In this world, a group of easy-going, loving and accepting people have been through a massacre and are trying to rebuild out of rubble. An evil dictator has put the police in charge of their organization to keep them in line. This group is not so easy-going anymore.

Sigh...I wish this was actually fiction, but I can't pretend it is. I can't use any names because I don't want anyone else to lose their job but, man alive, that scenario seems like it shouldn't be reality, right?

Asleep at All Hours

"Jake, come on, man, wake up."

At the base of a Maple tree sat Paul next to his sleeping friend, who was lying with his arms over his face and several bright red scratches glistening on his limbs. Occasionally, Paul would gently nudge Jake and ask him to wake up--Jake, however; did not, so Paul kept watch until morning.

************************************************************************************

"Well, yeah, it's his dream to become a professional boxer, but. . .every time he's threatened he goes to sleep. I don't want to put down his dreams, you know. . .but he has to know it isn't gonna work out, right?"

************************************************************************************

Jake's girlfriend was into canning. Apples, mostly. Really, she just liked canning apples. She also believed fully in Jake's dream of becoming a professional boxer.

"Why wouldn't he be able to do it? If a cripple can win a marathon, why can't he win a boxing match? I mean, I guess it would be hard if he couldn't stay awake, but he might get a K.O. on his first punch, right?! Then he'd win!"

************************************************************************************

Paul and Jake had been for a walk in the woods when a crow attacked. The minute the crow's talons touched Jake's skin, he fell asleep as the crow continued to peck and scratch at him. After ten minutes, the crow most likely thought Jake to be dead and flew off, leaving Paul to take care of the sleeper. The night was cold and Paul considered leaving several times, but he didn't want to leave Jake, nor did he want to drag him home. So he waited, shivering in the dark beneath a Maple tree.

Formulation

Blogging has been on the annoying side for me since I started this one up. I haven't really understood the process. But I think I have an idea now. My posts have been all over the place, and I think the key to success in this format is having a general theme to the blog. So, this is my announcement of a theme! I'm going to try to update more often to keep myself writing and sane (this is all due to some great advice from my brother). From now on, my posts will be the ideas I get for starting stories that probably won't go anywhere far. Yeah! Let's do it!

I Wanna Talk to the Johns

Here at Waynesburg University, as any type of English major, we have to take a literary theory class. The big requirement for this class is to write a twenty-five page paper with theory as its basis. We were allowed to pick almost anything as our text so I chose the song "They'll Need a Crane" by They Might Be Giants because it actually has a lot going for it in the literary theory department. However, nobody on the internet realizes this so my project is getting hard to finish. I would desperately love to be able to e-mail the Johns directly and tell them about this project for quite a few reasons. The problem with this is that I don't think the Johns want to be contacted like that by their fans. It makes sense. Oh well.

Getting Back to It

I tried writing a new poem for the heck of it. Here it is.

Night Melting

Remembering real life

exists coincides with feeling

the lemony soreness

of my shoulders. Realizing

I never opened a door—one

with little turquoise

gems and gold paint

incorporated lavishly into the framework—

that led me to a stair-filled

world of demons, is exactly

the same as finding

a miniscule mound of gunk

piled in the corner of my eyes. I’m always

trading love-filled ship rides

for bright lights and bad breath.

Stuck

Sometimes you get stuck so you start looking at older stuff to see if that was any good. I don't know if this one is. I think it's okay, but I can't figure out what would make it better...

I dreamt about my grand—

father last night.

He trembled oddly

as he hugged me. I thought

perhaps it was because

of his age, but

he seemed no older

than I ever knew him.

He was still sturdy,

round and wearing

suspenders.

I’d call him Grandpa

Malcolm if I had another

who shared his title;

just like I had a Grandma

Marie and

Grandma June.

But there was never a reason

to do the same for him.

And when he died

I stopped talking

about him altogether.

Not that I spoke

of him much in his

life.

But I’m certain

there’s something bringing

him back. Because I

never knew him, never

received his sagely

advice, I must have

called for his hug

in some way.

Lazy Day

I spent a few days out in Ohio with a friend. We didn't do much but sit around and enjoy each others company. It might not sound fascinating, but it's perfect for friends who never do much anyway.

So, why not put up another poem?

I’ve Never Heard a Heart as Strange as Yours

In truth, those are little red

marks of love.

Or passion. Maybe just

lust. All those tingly bits

of abstraction. Stars in the sky,

right? Rose petals

and all that. . .

But it looks like my neck

was mauled by

wolves with a vendetta

and yellow teeth.

I’m certain God

has cursed us. I think

He does it in His

free time. Bored,

so why not curse

those dear children?

He’s given you a milk jug heart

that emptied out long ago

and keeps pumping

with the violence of

the hungry wolves

living in my fingertips.

I’m not sure

what He’s done to me

but it has something

to do with everything underneath.

The houses and cold nights

bubbling inside my skin

and the pancake of colors

behind my eyes. The ones

I see overlapping whatever

might be in front of me.

Starting up again

I'm one lazy blogger, but I think that's okay with only two followers. The purpose of this blog was originally so bloggers I was contacting could look me up to see what I'm about, but I stopped doing that for a few months. Anyway, I'm going to try to do more blogging for the summer because Mr. Thiegs asked me to start up again. Fun stuff! This time, however; I'll just be writing anything.

Frankly, I'm still uncomfortable with the idea of just writing a journal online for people to see, but I'm going to try to break myself of that discomfort. As a restart to this wonderful world of online thoughts I want to start by posting a poem I never had work-shopped. Please give me some feedback about it!

And People I knew Were in the Hall

You and I were

bathing in a white

tub with green claws holding

it up. Your pants

were still on

because you’re a little self

conscious about showing

your legs to me.

I was naked

and we were watching a movie

on the TV across from our tub.

Kissing your jawbone,

“My mom will be mad

if she walks in on us.”

You smiled with the smile

you use in devilish pleasure

rather than out of joy.

I focused on tiny, dark hairs

above your lips, and you told me,

“We’re fine.”

I got out and started

dressing. Forgot I had new

underwear and showed you

how nice it was.

Frills and bows to

cover what you’d already seen.

Water sloshed from the basin.

“Oh, hey,

I’m gonna take off.”

I became a cape

around your neck.

“You can’t leave me

now. I just put on

underwear for you.”

And you were already

in the doorway when you said,

“But I like England;

it smells like Spain.”

From Now On

I will not really be blogging about what I do for StageofLife. That's right, I just used the title of this blog as part of my first sentence. So, what have I done, what will I be doing and why is this the case? All in good time. I'd first like to complain about the fact that my mouse will not stay where I put it. It makes things difficult. That's all the complaining I have to do though.

I've been working this summer on making StageofLife a better site. I think I've done alright. I know that some of what I've done has been useful. Like contacting that site about our writing contest. The CEO says that produced a lot of site traffic. I recruited at least one blogger and that's a little bit of something. There were the videos I found, Mr. Thiegs used many of them. And today I found pictures to illustrate the Etiquette sections of the site. When you boil things down to a list like this it seems like I didn't spend hours working on these things. I wouldn't say it seems like nothing, but look, it's a tiny paragraph. That paragraph is the product of hours in a steamy attic. I think I can safely say I'm proud.

I'll probably be keeping this blog up, but I'll switch topics. I have no clue what I'll blog about. My internship could continue if I find the time for it when I head back to campus, but who knows if I'll still want to write about it. Maybe I'll talk about being the fiction editor for our lit mag. I'm hoping to have more fun and creativity with it.

So, technically I covered the reason for not blogging about StageofLife. I'll be going back to school on the 19th. It's an early move-in due to my editing position, but I wish it could start sooner. While I've enjoyed my time working for Mr. Thiegs, life at home is dull. I could say "dull as. . ." but anything coming to mind is cliche so I won't. I am anxious to get back to school and have something to wake up for. Most days here I don't wake up until after 11. Life, life, I'm coming back!

It's possible I hate the internet

Of course I use the internet and find myself completely bored when I don't have access to it, but there's nothing I actually like about it. I've been doing a lot of different stuff for StageofLife and it makes sense that most of it (all of it?) is internet based. Look up blogs, email bloggers, find videos, email videos, and today I found newspapers. That's a little vague. Today I contacted newspapers and Education section editors to see if they will post a press release from StageofLife. These papers made me think about not liking the internet so much.

They have a lot of buttons on their site. Some are set up so you can scroll over a main topic and see what topics are under it. Some you have to click on the main topic and look around for the subtopics. Some have "contact us" at the bottom. Others have it at the top. Many have confusing lists of ways to contact and few emails. The good ones have complete staff lists with email addresses. I could go on about the frustrating system that newspapers have set up online, but I'll move on to some other points I don't like about the internet.

Facebook. Everyone knows there's not much to do on facebook unless you're addicted to the games. I'm not. I'm addicted to waiting for people to talk to me. Youtube means pausing my music to perhaps be amused for a minute, but for some reason I have a hard time even keeping my attention on the videos. Google comes in handy if I ever have anything I need to look up. Then there are all the other sites people tell me I could visit, laugh at, or waste time on, but I never care enough to remember or keep checking them. I just don't like those things. And here I am blogging. It's okay for me because writing is what I do, but it took a while for me to give in to doing this.

I'd rather listen to music and take pictures or look over my memories.

I think I wrote this in two minutes

I haven't written here for more time than I feel happy about. I'm supposed to keep this updated for people who might come to see what I'm all about. People who I've contacted and need some persuasion. Of course, I haven't actually been to work for a couple of weeks now so I didn't have anything to say on the topic.

I have been hearing from more people. Busy people. It's good to see writers who are busy. I'm not one of them so maybe I have some hope. I only wish I could get a hold of someone who could blog for the site. The CEO says I'm getting some common responses so at least I know it isn't just my approach that isn't working. I do believe people when they tell me why they won't be able to blog for us, I'm not calling anyone a liar; I just get worried I've done something wrong. I only contacted one person today.

The rest of my day was spent on youtube looking up videos for various stages of life. It was an interesting break from trudging through emails, but admittedly, not a strong point of mine. I don't actually get on youtube unless I'm finding a song to post on someone's facebook wall or someone forces me to watch something. Luckily, I have many friends who love procrastination so I was aware of some good videos in advance. One of the problems I have is trying to figure out what people with children, or grandparents want to watch. I couldn't tell you. However, I'm optimistic that some of the videos will be posted by the CEO. He seemed to like some of the stuff I found. I did have a hard time trying to come up with reasons why you would find the videos on the site. Mostly I just like things that are funny. You can only give that as a reason so many times. My summations are probably not the best and I hope Mr. Thiegs will either be okay with what I wrote, or figure out something better to say.

Sitting on Excitement

Well, I'm not too sure how to start this blog. I'm excited so I just want to jump in, but I find if you go with this approach in a pool you end up shocked by a burst of cold water. I don't know if blogs are like pools, but jumping just isn't my style.

I didn't find a lot today. Google likes to send notifications that deal with stages of life I'm not looking for, like how many stages of life a dragonfly has. Yeah, that would be helpful to someone, but I don't need to get twenty notifications about it when I'm looking for bloggers. So, I've looked at a lot of nothing today.

Then there was the googling of authors from Muse & Stone. The CEO asked me to look some of the authors up because their credibility as writers is already established. I googled names to try to find email addresses. It's a frustrating process because you might be able to find the right person and still not find the information you want. My work during this part of the day was mostly looking at google links that said amazon.com then hitting the next button.

Monotony. That's what I'm going through. It's something I was thinking about earlier in the day. So much of my life is spent in ritual and, while I wouldn't be able to get along without it in most cases, it's something that drives me mad. I can sit and work on a task for hours, but I think something inside claws at my belly the whole time. Of course, this isn't really a complaint about the work I'm doing. It seems an awful lot like it because I've been staring at the computer since 11 and it's now 5. I'm just not used to working so my retelling of events comes across as being bitter. Perhaps nothing I say will make anyone think I am not bitter because I'm about to go on about this working business (does the pun come across?).

I fear work which is why I'm putting myself into it. I've never had a job before and, while I don't want to be without one when I graduate, I'm terrified of what I'll end up doing. It's never been my policy to face my fears so I'm really in uncharted waters with all of this. My internship is a great opportunity and I actually like what I'm doing. When I find blogs I really like reading them to see what different people find interesting. The thing I'm unsure about is putting myself intentionally into more monotony. That little beast scratching at my stomach wall might get larger and start to eat precious organs. I guess I'll figure out if I'm suited for this if my kidneys don't fail.

One good sign is the cause for my excitement. That's right, now we're plunging in (notice it is not a jump, more of a submerging). I got a response from someone I contacted! This news is wonderful for me on a couple of different levels. For one, my job is actually accomplishing something. I'm not just shouting into the dark anymore, somebody has held up a candle. And I'm excited about something which is out of the norm for me. One of the writers from Muse & Stone emailed me back and I really hope she signs up to be a blogger.

Drudgery

I began my grueling work today. I mean, the official stuff that the CEO went over with me on Monday. My job is to look at blogs and invite the people who spark my interest to take a look at our site and possibly write for us. So, I went through approximately 180 links sent to me by google alerts and found nine writers I liked enough to contact.

I'm semi-used to this kind of work already, but it doesn't get much easier with time or experience. When I was a senior in high school I was Copy Editor of the yearbook and spent fifty minutes a morning staring at a computer, looking for wrong spellings of names and typos. When I'm at college I work for our literary magazine and read through hundreds of aspiring writers to find maybe a good piece every month. I guess I'm trying to say that this work isn't any different. Staring at a computer screen, looking for something good in a swamp bloggers. The work isn't bad really, just tiring and monotonous. You find some interesting stuff when you search for "stage of life."

Mostly it's articles about graduation, things about menopause, and dog food advertisements. Then, when you actually find a blog, the phrase is there because it's a quote from the Bible. I keep thinking I might be terrible for this job because I'm so biased, but then I think, "who isn't?" I'm less inclined to contact someone who focuses an entire blog, or several blogs on Christian life. It isn't that I don't like Christians, I just don't like preachers. Another bias is really liking people who talk about the arts and I'm not wholly sure the CEO is looking for poets, but he did put me in charge of this. When I look at other people's blogs I try to look at quality first. I go for subject if they pass the first test. I've been taught to do that in most situations so I guess it's a good policy here.

So, I have my worries about objectivity, but I'm pretty confident in my decisions. I found some really interesting blogs and writers today. There was a football player who wrote about travel, family and memories. He was really eloquent and it made me happy to see someone so diverse. There was a very descriptive piece about not wanting to go on; a dark subject, but why ignore something just because you might not want to admit it's true? I also read a feminist piece (there were a lot of these that were mostly crazy and nonsensical) that surprised me with it's very logical points about the unique experiences to women. And I found a poet! I'm not entirely sure how good he is, but the poem he had posted was something I liked. I'd call it a good day.

First Day

I'm starting an internship today with a website called Stage of Life.

I'm very excited to start looking at blogs and expose myself to a different type of writing than I'm used to. The site itself is a great opportunity for writers to express themselves as they go through life's journey. I'm looking forward to writing for it, but mostly for getting more writers involved.

I've learned a lot about what it takes to be published and the way the world is changing for writers so having a chance to make good writers known is important to me. I'm also fully behind the CEO's concept for the site. Check out the CEO's blog.